24.11.19

christmas was 

APPROACHING + I 

couldn’t stop it. 

many people thought. 

WTS way too soon. 

like WTF.

what an amount of 

events yet to take place 

BEFORE. + they did 

indeed take place. 

SPACE. head-space. 

space-shuttle. shut up. 

AM I REALLY GOING 

to see you again. 

what about the stressful 

dreams in the 

WAKING HOURS. 

yes what about THEM. 

PS: this week I’ve been a part of  Maisie Hill’s online community #HORMONEHELLTOHARMONY : a series of masterclasses, a lively exchange, a lot of questioning + answering. what I LOVE about Maisie Hill’s work, is how it is encouraging me to care for my hormonal health, helping me to understand my body. hormonal issues (in some cases severe, painful symptoms) are common among people with wombs, but they’re NOT NORMAL + since this concerns half of the population at some point in their lives, it’s important to talk about it. MAISIE HILL is sharing practical, empowering, life-changing knowledge + support. for a long time I didn’t care about my amenorrhea (having no menstruation at all) – one of the books which drastically changed that is #PERIODPOWERBOOK . THANK YOU.  

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music: Fake Plastic Trees

by Amanda Palmer

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23.11.19

she caught him 

MEDITATING 

as she entered 

the shared space. 

+ THEN 

he caught her 

meditating 

in another space. 

+ it was 

a little bit funny. 

both of them thought, 

MUTUALLY 

UNDERSTANDING 

the absence 

OF NEED 

for any exchange 

OF WORDS.

.

music: What a 

Wonderful World 

(Acoustic)

by Thomas Law

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22.11.19

if we don’t take 

our own pain 

serious, 

WHO ELSE 

is going to. 

if we don’t take 

our own sadness 

serious, 

WHO ELSE 

is going to. 

if we don’t take 

our own anger 

serious, 

WHO ELSE 

is going to. 

how to 

ACKNOWLEDGE

that.

I can’t be a 

heroine 

every day.

.

music: Look Around

by Elise Davis

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21.11.19

AS WE 

find stillness 

in thought 

of each other. 

AS WE 

send love 

messages over 

unimaginable 

distances. 

AS WE 

connect from the 

deepest place within. 

AS WE 

exchange the utter most 

honest thoughts of 

current existence. 

I CARRY YOU

within my heart 

like a treasure. 

THE KIND OF BOND 

which won’t tear, 

cause it was constructed 

to hold for a lifetime. 

.

music: Long Way

by 77 Bombay Street

.

20.11.19

when I release 

INTO THE LAYERS 

of my body, 

it is sure 

to bring up 

what it has been 

HOLDING ONTO

with the grip 

of the deepest 

tissues. 

THE PROCESS 

of letting go 

is a life-long 

journey. 

until I let all of it 

go COMPLETELY. 

except for 

WHAT IS BOUND

to the memory 

of my soul + / / 

the collective 

consciousness. 

you get the point 

DON’T YOU. 

.

music: Let It Go 

by Caleb Hyles

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19.11.19

I’M SORRY,

there’s a lack 

of storage, 

BOY. 

(she thought.) 

I just can’t 

undergo 

that whole 

PROCEDURE 

again. 

cause 

that download 

would shut down 

my system. 

is it worth causing 

all the damage 

just for the sake 

of playing 

THAT GAME. 

how to deal 

with being so 

HUMAN.

.

music: High and Dry

by Amanda Palmer

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18.11.19

when they met 

on that island 

FAR AWAY

from the rest 

of their worlds, 

they were to spend 

the most beautiful 

OF THEIR TIME

together. 

which 

IN RETROSPECTIVE

also marked the end of it. 

she observed 

years later. 

WHAT IF

they’d meet again. 

WHICH

I’m sure we won’t. 

I couldn’t talk about you. 

I couldn’t express 

what you meant to me, 

it would have been 

RESENTED

by all those people. 

you didn’t have 

my back, 

while I had yours 

all the while 

UNTIL IT BROKE ME. 

a tragedy 

REALLY. 

.

music: Remind Me

by Conrad Sewell

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17.11.19

I WONDERED

whether any of it 

would come back 

TO ME. 

+ IF SO, 

whether it would 

come in another 

form. 

maybe more 

GRACEFULLY. 

maybe less 

destructively. 

whether 

I would be able 

TO MAKE PEACE

with it + love it 

fully. 

I WONDERED. 

.

music: Save The Last 

Dance For Me 

(The Drifters Cover)

by Justin Diaz

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16.11.19

when I try to 

MAKE SENSE OF LIFE, 

it loses all of it. 

+ FALLS APART 

in my hands 

while I try to puzzle 

the pieces together. 

when 

RIGHT / WRONG

is a separation 

which ultimately 

doesn’t exist, 

the DEFINITION of it 

is an endless struggle. 

how to comprehend 

that which you can’t. 

how do you come 

TO YOUR SENSES. 

/ is that just a phrase.

there is always 

A FIRST TIME

I do a certain thing. 

MAYBE 

that’s awkward. 

.

music: Ave Maria (Cover)

by Loreley Stang Holzer

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15.11.19

IF SIRENS 

are calling 

+ you are falling 

for them. 

GET THE HELL OUT 

of wherever you are 

+ run far. 

let me tell you, 

it’ll make you feel blue 

TO FALL

for that kind of call. 

CAUSE SIRENS

aren’t calling 

you personally. 

they’re 

JUST. 

calling. 

.

music: Sirens

by Tom Odell

.

14.11.19

POSSIBLY 

it is not really 

about 

how you look 

BUT RATHER

it might be 

about 

how you feel 

to your surrounding 

in any given situation. 

where 

do I have to 

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

for my own 

healing 

so that 

I am able 

TO SUPPORT

those 

close to me. 

.

music: Sweet Dreams 

(Are Made of This) 

[Acoustic Version]

by Ortopilot

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13.11.19

+ SO 

I’m hanging out 

at the borders of 

AUTHENTICITY. 

not finding 

THE RIGHT WORDS

for a scent which 

turned out to be 

less frightening 

than I had 

REMEMBERED IT. 

…

conversation 

took place 

WOVEN 

into different layers 

of consciousness, 

which complemented 

each other. 

INTERWOVEN. 

.

music: Judy Blume

by Amanda Palmer

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12.11.19

the quality 

of the way 

he moved, 

of how he 

EMBODIED 

himself 

was so sweet, 

so comforting, 

that his PRESENCE 

made all the difference

in the room. 

I SEE YOU,

she wanted 

TO TELL HIM. 

+ she would have 

meant it more 

than ever. 

he wanted 

TO TELL HER

the same. 

but somehow 

they choreographed 

the situation so badly, 

that they 

MISSED EACH OTHER.

.

music: Dust in the Wind

by Caroline Jones

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11.11.19

what is happening 

beneath the surface 

of that picture 

shall remain 

UNDEFINED. 

cause 

aren’t we all 

ENTITLED 

to the space of 

figuring 

ourselves out. 

.

+ MAYBE 

I will be busy 

with figuring myself 

OUT

for the entirety 

of my life. 

.

+ that’s OK. 

OK. 

I miss the nature 

of your embrace.

he felt the same.

.

music: Black Velvet

by Sandi Thom

.

10.11.19

where does 

MY SYSTEM 

make sense, 

where do I 

GET LOST

in my own 

SYSTEM + WHAT

is my system 

built of. 

how much energy 

does it take me 

to uphold 

that structure 

in relation to 

what 

I GET OUT OF IT. 

what do I need 

TO GET OUT OF

my system.

MY SYSTEM.

.

music: The Thing About Things

by Amanda Palmer 

.

9.11.19

IF WE COULD

cultivate a generosity 

of exchange. 

IF WE COULD

cultivate spaces where 

we recognize ourselves 

within each other. 

IF WE COULD

cultivate general 

love 

for all people 

– aka the other members 

of our species. 

IF WE COULD

then nothing. 

it would be 

great enough 

as that. RIGHT.

…

+ TO TRUST, 

that what I am 

putting forth 

wants to find 

expression. 

I’m merely 

HOLDING SPACE

for it to 

PASS THROUGH.

thank you, 

that’s all. 

.

.

8.11.19

+ IF 

we really believe 

in creating 

that energetic shift 

in the universe, 

I’m sure, 

IT IS

happening.

.

music: Worlds Apart

by Ash

.

7.11.19

when I am insecure 

about my teaching, 

I hear her say 

YOU JUST GO THERE + 

DO YOUR THING. 

she, 

who always finds 

the right words 

to pick me up 

when I’ve stumbled 

OVER MY OWN FEET.

…

BOY, 

did he look like 

an angel fallen 

from heaven lying 

in savasana. 

BATHING IN BLISS.

…

my sister + me, 

we walked towards 

the ocean, when I saw 

YOU. 

I ran towards you, 

you caught me, 

threw me up into the air 

+ we did a little 

rock’n’roll dance. 

I’m sure we were 

beaming at each other 

like idiots 

walking along the seaside 

by the little french town. 

YOU, 

who for one night 

in my teens 

were the boy of my dreams. 

…

if you could 

READ MY MIND, 

what would 

you want to read.  

…

.

music: Fire (feat. Aina More)

by Bumi Thomas

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6.11.19

THE WOMAN

was bent over 

a bleeding, 

swollen arm. 

APPARENTLY

she was incapable 

of hitting a good vein. 

she reminded me 

of MEMORIES 

I never had. 

she reminded me 

of SONGS 

I never sang. 

YET, 

she reminded me. 

the RESONANCE

of other lives.

.

+ then finally 

the wave 

of gratitude 

for being 

WHO I AM.

.

music: Look What They've Done to My Song, Ma

by Melanie

.

5.11.19

do you think 

I’m WEIRD 

now. 

NOW, 

that you know. 

/ MAYBE 

you already 

thought so 

before. 

I mean, 

I MOST 

CERTAINLY 

am, 

don’t 

GET ME

wrong.

.

music: Deep End

by River Tiber

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