the DIS-ORIENTATION
of dreaming about you
so vividly + waking up
in a COMPLETELY
different place.
WHY ARE YOU
hanging out in my
sub-consciousness
ANYWAYS.
.
ALSO:
stating the obvious.
talking in my language
is NOURISHING.
.
+ isn’t it funny
what a level of
CONNECTION
it brings.
.
music: Wemmer Gaht
by Dabu Fantastic
.
the FULL MOON
brought it all on.
the WATER,
the wind, the storm
(inside out. BOY,
you turn me.
UPSIDE DOWN.).
the chaos.
a calm, heavy smile
across the in-depth
BRIGHTNESS.
more allowing,
less forcing.
SHE
told herself.
as she listened
TO THE STORIES
of the rain.
.
music: Sailor Moon
Theme Song
.
the world was a
SWOLLEN,
INFLAMED
place.
so FULL,
it was impossible
to see clear
(what matters).
narrow in its width.
IF the absence
of flow
wouldn’t have been
SO severe,
fullness
could have passed as
EXPANSION.
.
music: Apologize (Cover)
by Dave Winkler
.
what was
MEANT TO BE.
supposed to be.
could have been.
did not happen
still.
APPARENTLY.
reality as it appears,
is how we
MAKE SENSE of it.
as we
LINK TOGETHER
what simply stands
next to each other.
.
+ tell stories
of untold truths.
to make sense
of what
POSSIBLY
doesn’t have any.
WHO KNOWS.
.
if our stories
would match,
that would be
GRAND.
why all the
DISCOMFORT,
body.
WHY.
.
music: If There's a Fire in Your Heart
(feat. Liam Jordan, Paula Wichall & Ben Greenland)
by Grace Petrie
.
IF WE could
just all try
at least
[through (inter-)
ACTION + behaviour]
/ sth.
what energy are
you RADIATING.
how are you
SHOWING UP
for your people.
I asked
MY VERY SELF.
what about myself.
can I practice
COMPASSION
towards myself.
CAN I FORGIVE
my mistakes.
(can I love myself.)
it even felt inauthentic
to write it,
that’s how much of
a hypocrite I am today.
OH DEAR
HUMANNESS
of mine.
.
music: Joan of Arc
by Jennifer Warnes
.
MAYBE
stagnation
is a social
STATE.
the need
for community
became ever so
URGENT
as we saw
ourselves pulled
into the comfort
ZONE of isolation.
.
pick me up.
HUG ME TIGHT.
make me laugh.
I thought
.
+ then
went back to
what I called
LIFE
at the time.
.
music: All That We've Become
by Society
.
if NO ONE
would value
what you do,
would you
STILL do it.
PERSONALLY,
yes.
IS ART
measurable + if
yes, HOW.
.
as I leaned back
INTO AN ATTITUDE
of deep listening,
I felt my cells
DECOMPRESS.
OFC
I’m never
doing enough.
no one
IN THIS SOCIETY
ever is.
THANK YOU
for that one.
an endless story.
.
music: Smile
(Pictures or It Didn't Happen)
by Amanda Palmer
.
about vibes:
you have them
ANYWAYS.
everything is vibration
on an atomic level.
you can,
HOWEVER,
take responsibility
for your vibes
to some degree,
I believe.
.
I have a lot more
CONVERSATIONS
WITH YOU
than we actually have.
how does that
TRANSLATE INTO
how we relate
to each other.
.
you can say many things
about instagram.
one of them being,
that it builds connection,
otherwise inexistent.
the ‘I SEE YOU’ connection.
another being,
that it disconnects us
FROM REALITY.
.
music: Alles was ich mache ist Kunst
by Uns
.
IN THOUGHT
of each other.
unsure of where
WE ARE.
so near.
+ YET SO FAR.
as if you were here.
I can feel you clear.
-ly.
DEARLY,
yours sincerely.
what is all of this.
how have I
COME TO MISS.
what remains
ENCAPSULATED
in that one moment.
in thought
OF EACH OTHER.
.
music: Je t'aime encore
by Patricia Kaas
.
living one’s
PURPOSE
isn’t necessarily
pleasant.
.
I find myself lost
in the uncertainty
OF WHY.
.
sometimes
INSIGNIFICANCE
makes things lighter
to carry.
sometimes
insignificance
makes me
LOSE FAITH.
.
like I forgot why
I CHOSE TO BE ME.
in this context
LOVE
becomes ever
so complex.
.
music: Love Corail
by Louise Verneuil
.
AS I DROPPED
out of the world,
it suddenly
seemed unreal.
.
people gathered
BUT DIDN’T SEE
each other.
.
SLEEP FELT NUMB.
.
the loss of
CONNECTION
to the ground
below my feet +
POSSIBLY
everyone else’s
manifested rapidly.
.
the knowledge
of BELONGING
anywhere at all
was not anymore
WHAT
it had never been.
.
what
ON EARTH
are we doing.
.
music: Lost
by Ash
.
with any STRUCTURE built,
individually / collectively,
we must ask ourselves:
is the restriction
it creates
SUPPORTIVE.
for all people involved.
IF NOT,
it will create a gap
BETWEEN THE PEOPLE
it supports + the ones
it doesn’t.
[DO I NEED TO SAY MORE.]
.
where am I
RESTRICTED
by structures
which do not
SUPPORT ME
[in my wellbeing /
to live up to
MY FULL POTENTIAL /
to follow my purpose
in this world].
.
how can I change
that. + WHAT
is my purpose
ANYWAYS.
.
music: Balanced on a Wire
by Ben Watt
.
to notice
THE PHYSICAL
SHIFTS
within you,
depending on
WHAT + WHO you’re
surrounded by.
WHERE you are.
what thoughts
you’re occupied by.
THIS, TOO,
is bodyliteracy.
is self-knowledge.
knowing how to
SELF-REGULATE
when destabilised.
so that when
YOU HAVE THE CHOICE,
you’re able to make
a good one
FOR YOUR OWN SAKE.
are you happy now.
.
music: Parterre
by Baze
.
JUST LIKE THAT
she washed
it all out of herself.
out of her system.
.
the stupid comments.
the annoying
way of walking.
that fucking FACE.
the discomfort.
THE DISGUST.
.
she washed it
out + flushed it down
the toilet with
some other stuff.
.
like proper letting go,
YOU KNOW. + then
.
I saw all clear.
.
music: Ordinary World
by Joy Williams
.
to NAME experiences
is re-educating my brain.
.
SHARING our stories
is expanding our capacity
to understand
WHAT IS GOING ON in
society + where we were
blind to the privileges
we were born into.
.
SHARING IS CRUCIAL for
raising awareness.
fostering empathy.
refining the manner
we relate to each other.
.
YES,
at times it is exposing,
it is making you vulnerable,
it might be uncomfortable.
.
music: Black Tie
by Grace Petrie
.
THANKFULLY
we don’t always
know ahead
of what
SHAPE + calibre
the process of
letting go will be,
when we
INVITE IT IN.
.
she was so
DISGUSTED
by him,
that she couldn’t even
look him in the eye.
(+ it’s horrible
to write such a
SENTENCE).
NOW,
how to let go of that.
how to
COME TO PEACE
with what you can’t
change.
how to
FORGIVE YOURSELF
for having
invested too much.
.
music: Glück
by Baze
.
SHE
was jumping
barefoot
through cold,
DAMP AIR,
as her body
started to
EXPELL
suppressed cries.
they sounded
as if she couldn’t
breathe.
they felt
as if she was
VOMITING.
trauma.
+ she realised,
that.
to PROGRESS
into the next
chapter
she was writing,
she needed to
LET THE LAST
one go.
.
which was also
a question of
COMMITMENT.
.
letting go
doesn’t mean to
BECOME PASSIVE.
it means to
quite actively
WASH OUT
of my system,
what brings
STAGNATION.
.
IN THAT SENSE
it is a dynamic state
of being.
.
.
the spaces
I’m coming from
INEVITABLY
inform who I AM.
one way / the other.
.
do I act
according to my
CULTURE / despite
of it.
how do we relate
TO EACH OTHER
forth + back.
.
where do we have to
RE-ASSESS
how we cultivate
human behaviour.
communication.
CONFLICT.
.
if DIVERSITY is
such a trendy word
in our society,
how do we
CULTIVATE DIVERSITY
within our individual
SELVES.
what are
ALL THE QUALITIES
I contain + how
can I give all of them
SPACE.
how do I diversify
my PRACTICE.
my THOUGHT patterns.
my EMOTIONS.
my EXPRESSION
of self.
.
then I got
LOST in my
own words.
.
music: Imagine
by Ashley Benjamin
.
WHERE do
I end + where
do you begin.
how can I support
MY SELF better,
so that I am able
to show up at my best
FOR OTHERS + my
surroundings.
which utopias am I
living in + are they
SUSTAINABLE.
WHERE do
I end + where
DO YOU begin.
.
everything was
FORESEEN + yet
it happened.
some things
HOWEVER
were not
foreseen + YET
they happened.
I mean,
that’s just life,
ISN’T IT.
sometimes
I also don’t know
WHAT I’M DOING.
.
music: 2038 (feat. Tribel)
by RapNose
.
